This is a story about fear and how it changed me for the better. By making me weak it made me grow stronger, dig deeper, and search my soul for purpose.
Sometimes it takes a red light for us to stop and smell the roses. Mine came with sirens. When I had my first panic attack I thought it was a heart attack. Still recovering from an unaddressed postpartum depression, I was working my ass in the newspaper, and raising two little kids, with my husband starting a new business and building an island cabin. We were in over our heads, renting out our home, and living in a rental to finance a chance for a better future. It made sense on paper and we were determined to see it true, but the cost turned out to be higher then we had expected. Another panic attack followed shortly, so anxiety settled and I began to shrink.
Those of you who have some experience with it will know just how paralyzing it can be and how your mind finds itself on slippery slopes. Extreme uncertainty is how I would describe that state of being. I was locked inside my head. But, what had appeared to be one of the worse experiences in my life eventually proved to be the beginning of my journey to recovery. You can read more about how I overcame that beast and learn about proofed and tested tools that might help you overcome related difficulties here.
Reconnecting to my core and rediscovering my passions are silver linings of that journey, showing me that what we seek is waiting to be found.
Growing from a place of wonder
Funny thing is that anxiety changed me – for the better. By making me weak it made me grow stronger and more resilient. It directed my focus to self-awareness and mindest, had me dig deeper, and search my soul. This experience had a profound impact on me and was facilitated by therapy, my loved ones, and friends, with books, long walks, creative outlets, and yoga, and by a community of likeminded individuals, I found online.
Reconnecting to my core and rediscovering my passions are shining silver linings of that journey, showing me that what we seek is waiting to be found. We are only to stretch our hands with faith. If you are looking to align your aspirations with intentions too, you might find my blooming guide helpful. You can download it by subscribing here. I created it to help you unlock your growth power and you can download it by subscribing here. When I think of how I began this journey with fear and uncertainty only to find myself moving forward with such ease and grace, as if guided by divine support, I am filled with gratitude. My inspiration and motivation to share the possibilities come from a place of wonder. I got so much from the community and feel the need to give some back.
I believe that the quality of our every day begins in the way we tend to the details.
Giving voice to possibilities
I created an IG profile intending to share about my journey and hopefully motivate others to give themselves a chance and was thrilled by the community. So much inspiration, support, and motivation on my phone screen – it drew me in. As months went by I became more passionate about creating digital content and storytelling, and being the voice of the possibility. I took courses, watched lives, worked through lessons, learned, and grew more than I dreamed I would. Lately, I started to explore photography and fell in love with it˙s creative potential, so, these days, I mostly write and take photos. Due to my endless curiosity, I also discovered I have a soft spot for calligraphy, and I tend to get lost in the practice when in need of a pause.
Though I was always intentional about homemaking, with more time on my hands I was given a chance to make, build, create, upcycle, or DIYjust about anything I could get my hands on, therefore you may expect to find an occasionally related share here. Mindful dwelling is the foundation of the life I was able to rebuild. I believe that the quality of our everyday begins in the way we tend to the details, our families, and the community. Little things bring fruit, or fail to our time here.
For the sake of full disclosure
I must also admit that I never thought I would be writing about these things with such passion. I did feel drown the conscious living philosophy, but I used to think that it was just a hype, bc, who˙d ever have the time to explore? Like that˙s real life? Have they nothing better to do than to talk about elusive dreams to those who have no time to dream? But I saw the red light and heard the sirens, so now I know. It is not about the time, it’s about the perspective.